3 Tips For Dealing With A Contentious Custody Dispute

30 December 2017 by Jonathan Phillips

Few things in life are more stressful and emotional than a custody dispute, especially when your relationship with your ex is less than amicable and you don't agree about how to share custody of your children. Any time children are involved in a divorce, the stakes are much higher and there is more that can go wrong. Here are a few ideas for dealing with a contentious custody dispute in order to do what's best for both your children and yourself:

Hire a Family Law Attorney

Even if your divorce is finalized, if there are ongoing child custody problems you need a family law attorney. Your lawyer will advocate for your rights and give you a better chance at getting a favorable custody agreement. They can also add a less emotional and more neutral voice to the custody proceedings, which is important when emotions are likely running high on both sides. Your family law lawyer will even give you pointers on how to navigate your custody agreement more smoothly, and what to avoid when preparing to go before the judge.

Set Healthy Boundaries

It's important for your emotional well-being, your legal case, and your kids' happiness that you learn to set healthy boundaries with your ex. One example of a healthy boundary is to have a rule that you never talk badly about your ex in front of the kids since this can be confusing and painful for them.

Another possible boundary is that you stick to practical and logistical topics when talking to your ex and steer clear of more personal topics than quickly lead to arguments. In especially contentious situations, it may be best to have most of your communication come from your attorney.

Find Common Ground When Possible 

If at all possible, it's beneficial for your kids if you and your ex find common ground and learn to collaborate in a civil way when it comes to your children and your shared custody agreement. Some family law firms offer mediation services that help you and your ex reach agreements and get to a more peaceful place with each other in a neutral and professional setting. Sometimes it's possible to set aside your personal dislike for your ex and remember that they also love your children. 

Working closely with an experienced divorce attorney, having healthy boundaries, and knowing when to find common ground are effective ways to make the most out of a difficult situation.

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